Temptations

Friday after work I scheduled $825 to be paid off debt on Monday. This would have dropped my total amount owed below $2,000 - and forced Darling and me into a second week of relatively stressful frugality (we made a thousand dollar payment the week before). I came home to tell Darling this good and bad news. His response was basically, "Nope. The REAL good news is that I was laid off today, and the REAL bad news is that I purchased a hard drive online about an hour ago!" Yay, communication :)
So I edited the payment down to $500, leaving us a small cushion and covering the cost of Darling's purchases and, like, gas and stuff.

No, I'm not confessing only making a $500 payment...I'm very proud of the fact that we've paid $2,000 this month to begin with. Nor am I confessing the hard drive, which is more a necessity than a want and a very well-deserved purchase. What I am confessing is that the next day Darling and I went shopping and purchased him a brand new, really cool, and incredibly expensive shirt.

Does my husband need a brand new shirt? Not really, certainly not a dress shirt, certainly not for the price of three or four brand new good-quality work shirts. The timing is especially bad because today offers me the excellent opportunity to write about second-hand joy. I consider myself to be a devotee of used clothing purchased from thrift stores or - even better - picked up from clothing swaps. Now I feel kind of hypocritical.

I'm sort of rolling this all around in my head, over and over again, because this was a fairly unusual act on my part - I seriously forced the shirt on the poor man. But I very much wanted him to have it, something nice he could wear when we go to shows, some trace of our brief courtship, maybe a symbol of the life we're going to lead...or maybe a hearkening back to the life we may never actually pursue, as it lies outside the confines of cooperation and farms and construction and sweat and freeganism...and how does that make me feel?

Within the next couple of months, Darling and I will have purchased our freedom. We accomplished this by forgoing many normal purchases and almost all extravagant purchases. In our debt-free future, however, I'm unsure what our normal spending is going to look like. Because there are some nice things I'd like to have, and we do intend to start traveling again, and...well, maybe we've earned it.

Not that this means saving money won't be a serious focus in the coming weeks.

Bah. Anyone else ever face a spending spree on the near-eve of debt freedom?

Working on the bike and wardrobe

You know how I missed over a week of bike riding due to a brake issue? Well, there was a little piece of wire that needed to be clicked into position. And that fixed the problem. Thanks to my beloved house mate Em for pointing this out and thereby saving me from horrible, horrible embarrassment moments later at the bike shop.

Today a copy of Southwest Cycling News was delivered to my workplace, a publication I desperately needed and had no idea existed. It lists dozens of bike tours around town and Texas taking place in the next four months and there are advertisements for adult bicycle safety classes! This will be precious reading and planning material in the coming days indeed.

Anyway, the moment my bike was "fixed," I rode it down to the St. Vincent Charity shop on Congress. I decided to spend whatever it took to to buy everything that fit my needs/wardrobe list. I got tired of trying on clothes surprisingly quickly, but approached the counter with enough of a load to really worry about the total sum. Was a shopping spree even this utilitarian worth breaking the bank?

I needn't have worried. Thanks to a sale, and the general low prices of that particular shop, my total bills was $16.24! For $16.24 I got two pairs of jeans, a sweater, two short-sleeved shirts, one long-sleeved cotton shirt, and a blue flat sheet for repairing an old quilt. That and I was totally shopped out for the first time in recent memory. It looks like creating a perfect wardrobe will be less expensive than I imagined.

Wardrobe List

I've never had a complete, comfortable wardrobe. As a child, I cut the cuffs on my shirts and refused to wear jeans, wondering why clothing had to be so uncomfortable. As a teen I finally understood that the hand-me-downs from my cousin never actually fit. I was short and chubby, she was tall and skinny. Learning to find - and wear - clothes that fit was an ongoing challenge. On the bright side, I still eagerly accept friends' discarded clothing, so the experience wasn't too scarring.

In my family, if you weren't scraping by you were spoiled. School shopping ensured that each child had enough shirts to get them through until laundry day, and two pairs of pants so you'd have one to wear while the other was washing. My Mom didn't sew, patch, or darn, but she did encourage us mightily to continue wearing every garment until it was no more, and nothing ever got thrown away. My little sister had a knee-length purple dress, which later became a short sleeveless summer dress, and eventually evolved into a tank top, without a single alteration beyond cutting off the sleeves.

I never quite grew out of these habits. My wardrobe has always mirrored my current work uniform, with some jeans thrown in. Thus the two pairs of jeans, one sweater, and a handful of shirts. To hide my lack of variety, I generally stick to the same colors and outfit: I wear a black shit and blue jeans almost every single day. My hair evolves at a rapid, steady pace to keep things interesting.

This year that is going to change. I am going to create a Wardrobe List similar to the Pantry Lists at the beginning of cookbooks. I will purchase everything on the list, maybe with some surplus, maintain each item, and eventually replace it. Then I will feel comfortable and attractive all of the time and be a more pleasant person.

Here is my list and notes:

* Underwear (12) Obviously. I want to say "cute" underwear, but it would provide a false impression of my real life wardrobe.

* Bras (7) The only place to buy bras in Austin, in my opinion, is Sew Sisters on East 3rd. Go there right now.

* Socks (7) I have a grudge against buying socks. Cute socks, like brand name jeans, are often a trick. Either absurdly expensive (organic wool, hand-knitted), or made to last two or three wearings, cute socks generally fail me within a month or two. This is probably because I walk so much. My Mom buys me cute socks a couple of times a year, they last about three months on average. I'll find something good quality and durable and stock up.

* Glasses (?) I'd like to have a back-up pair, and I'd like some with tinted lenses.

* Shirts...

- 5 basic t-shirts

- 5 nice button-up shirts with short sleeves

- 3 long-sleeved shirts with buttons

- 3 basic long-sleeved shirts

- 3 sweaters

* Pants...

- 5 pairs of blue jeans

- 3 pairs of tan slacks (jeans to slacks ratio will change depending on employment)

- 2 pairs of nice black pants

- yoga pants

- running shorts

* Shoes...

- nice simple heels for dressing up

- good walking and jogging shoes

- flip flops

- work/hiking boots

* Etc...

- Coat, scarf, hoodie, warm hat, summer hat

Bangs of Various Sorts

Today I had an interview with a professional HR representative/family friend. He gave me oodles of good advice and I'm actually looking forward to filling out job applications again.

I've been feeling way frumpy lately. I have one pair of jeans acceptable to wear to work, and that is only because the single hole is very tiny and somewhere none of my (male) employers have had the nerve to point out to me. Let's just say that you can see both London and France. Do they have that rhyme in England? Or New Zealand? I wonder what naughty things you are thinking about my pants, or if you are just absolutely horrified, trying to imagine what might be seen through the holes in a woman's jeans that one would see "London" and "France."

Was there ever an Old Zealand, Lizzie?

Anyways, yes, frump. Not helped by the fact that we didn't buy clothing during No Spend month, and for the first time ever ended No Spend Month without a surplus, and then spent $600 on oral surgery so that we are exactly that much money in the red, which means No Spend Month, like this run-on sentence, has been extended by several weeks and into the foreseeable future.

The frump is also not helped by the fact that it is actually quite cold here in Austin and I have only one sweater (to match my one pair of jeans).

I did not want to meet the HR man who will change my life - let's call him Captain HR - looking or feeling frumpy. And when all else fails, I change my hair. I don't know how this habit developed, I don't even know how to braid hair, but somehow this stuff on my head is steadily evolving so that people assume that my bad hair days are now some sort of misguided fashion statement. Which is a good thing, because people respect even misguided fashionistas more than lazy slobs who make up words.

So I emotionally blackmailed my best friend to cut my hair after her baby shower, because my appearance in the coming months should be her top priority. Bless her heart, she has given me the best free hair cut she has ever given me, and I just feel so cute and chic.

Then, after my interview today I went to an optometrist appointment. Last week one of my contacts exploded and convinced me I had pink eye. Fortunately, I was able to beg a free pair of contacts off the nice people at Texas State Optical and regained my vision. Every year I switch between glasses and contacts to give my eyes a break, and I'm always disappointed in my small choice of frames due to my budget and limiting prescription. I always have to ask if they have a separate "affordable" selection (usually the frames covered by Medicaid are set aside, so you have to ask about them). Today, however, the nice woman behind the counter took one look at me, reached into the "affordable" box, and pulled out the cutest little frames. I almost always purchase thick black frames, but normally these have to be ginormous and cover my entire face to handle my prescription. But somehow my prescription getting worse means I need smaller frames - presumably because the glass lens has gotten so thick that the bridge of my nose might just collapse from the weight.

So come Saturday I will be donning new cute little glasses and sporting my sweet new haircut and feeling all sorts of better about myself. Which is the good news. The bad news is that today cost me $224. Which brings our medical costs in the past two weeks to over $800. But fear not: Captain HR has convinced me that I could get a particular job by following his advice, a single job that will pay substantially more than I earn working for 3+ companies. So my goal is to apply for that tomorrow and be hired in the next few weeks so that I start the New Year with a bang. As well as bangs, and a nice collection of sweaters and pants to round things out.

Feeling Good!

How Awesome is Beth Terry over at Fake Plastic Fish? Way awesome. So awesome, in fact, that she hosted one of the few give-aways that has ever tempted me, passing along a pair of Feelgoodz flip-flops.

And I WON! Not at first. Someone else won the original random drawing. However, I won by having size 8 1/2 feet. Yay for me.

The Feelgoodz are cute. To be fair, it doesn't take much to strike me as cute: all black will do the trick. But what's really important is that these babies are comfy. There seems to be a lot more cushion to these all-natural latex flops than I've noticed on any other pair before. The tread looks like it might hold its own against hot Texas sidewalks as well. I gave up on flip-flops a long time ago because my shoes must withstand the test of being a primary mode of transportation. But I can see that these will live a good long life as lounging-around, nipping into the garden, strolling to yoga class shoes. And when they do wear thin? Straight into the compost!

Thanks again to Beth, who is now giving away a plastic-free wooden brush. Everyone go comment ASAP!

Undergarments and Such

I've been laying low the past several days, in life as well as the blogosphere. I had a good week at work, which left me feeling strangely exhausted as well as better-off financially, and kept up with my local shopping.

On my way home from work Wednesday I stopped into Lovely on South 1st, lured to the porch by a rack advertising $3 items. Expecting the usual stains and rips of similar sales, imagine my surprise to find an ankle length brown leather skirt still bearing the original $100+ price tag! When I went in to pay for this treasure, I was offered a glass of wine, which is apparently a weekly promotion. So, a beautiful skirt and a glass of wine after work for only $4 (including tax).

Thursday a housemate and I checked out Sew Sister on 3rd Street. There we met Megan Summerville, who is possibly the coolest seamstress I've ever met. She sews bras and underwear to order, offering a wide variety of laces and styles as well as an option for bring-you-own-fabric. A perfectly fitted, sewn in Austin custom bra costs only $68. Better yet, she has a small surplus of bras which cost on $11 each! She took our measurements and stood at the dressing room, ready to make adjustments on her sewing machine when needed. She also educated us on the dangers of polyurethane in bra pads. Polyurethane, on top of being really hard to spell, releases toxins as it ages. The older a padded (or even lined) bra is, the more poisonous it becomes - and the bra rests against two lymph nodes.

On a too-much-information note, I did not think a lace bra without padding would be comfortable in the slightest. I have always had back problems and difficulty bra shopping, for both financial and physiological reasons. I am a Double F. Regardless of my weight (at least within the 135-200 lb range), the cup size does not change. I have tried many bras in an attempt of find something that doesn't dig into my shoulders, sag within a few hours, or sacrifice comfort for support. These simple, beautiful bras put all my previous best-bras-ever to shame.

So, for $22 I a came home with two of the prettiest, healthiest, most environmentally friendly and comfortable pieces of underwear I have ever owned. While I can't be sure of where the textiles were produced, at least I know these garments weren't produced by slave labor, which has been my biggest concern when buying undergarments for several years.

Anyways. Yesterday Darling went to Texas State Optical and spent $5 getting his glasses repaired. The little nose-pieces had fallen off :( I sent $9 to my student loan company and $9 to my investment fund.

Aside from work and occasional shopping, I've basically been doing my impression of a giant slug the past several days. After years of borrowing DVDs, Darling and I watched the last season of Buffy the Vampire Slayer this week and saw the last episode at 4 a.m. this morning. I also read Foreign Bodies yesterday. I read sci-fi once in a blue moon, usually when I'm at my absolute laziest. As in, too lazy to get a book for myself and reading whatever it is Darling has from the library. Maybe I'll pick up the pace this week.

Why I Don't Bleach

First thing this morning I was invited to go out and plant some beets. Deciding to enjoy a quick cup of coffee first, I slipped online for a brief glance through my blogroll. Surprised that someone actually commented on yesterday's lackluster post, I read Col's question and typed a "quick" response, which actually took well over an hour. The beets were planted and the gardener was making lunch. I enjoyed lunch, read my blogroll, went to the library, and came home to yet another comment.

I felt surprised by my long-time reader Lizzie's response, and decided to edit this post to make my point more clear. That was about five hours ago. I am so sick of this subject. The more direct I try to be, the more muddled my explanations. So I am going to sum it up as simple and clear as I know how, and apologize if anyone misunderstands me. I adore Lizzie and Col both, so hopefully this does the trick.

Col said: I'm probably missing something here but why the not happy about Clorox?

Answer: I don't buy any Clorox products because I find baking soda, vinegar, lemon juice, and other alternatives to be more effective, cost efficient, and convenient. However, the word Clorox makes me think about dirty toilets, harsh chemicals, and poison control - not concepts I like to associate with body care products!

Lizzie points out that Wal-Mart (which I mentioned in an offhand way in my original post as one of the corporations I don't support), has very eco-friendly policies and offers employment to many people who might otherwise do without. Which is cool.

However, I don't shop at Wal-Mart. What little recreational or grocery shopping I do takes place in local businesses, because they are more convenient and plentiful where I choose to live. This isn't a choice everyone in the world can make, but I'm fortunate and stubborn enough to have managed it.

This isn't to say I would shop at Wal-Mart if there was one within walking distance. I prefer small businesses. They don't have to make the hard decisions multi-billion dollar companies do, and I don't have to justify those decisions when I shop there. More important, I simply don't shop that much. I'd rather produce than consume!

On Getting What You Pay For

Often said with a snort, "you get what you pay for" suggests that more expensive products are inherently more valuable. Most of the time I don't find this to be the truth. Thrift store buys and even free offers match or exceed the value of their boutique counterparts. A car borrowed for a road trip is just as reliable than a rental, a pair of jeans saved from a free pile fits just as well as new from the mall, a haircut from an experienced friends garners as much attention as a visit to the salon.

It's when we look at traditional retail outlets that getting what one pays for becomes a harsh reality. Why is there such disparity between thrift store quality and discount store quality? On the rare occasions I buy something new - such as the tennis shoes purchased only a few months ago from Target - the item in question falls to pieces long before the immensely cheaper thrift product does. My guess is that items that survive their first (second or third) owner in good enough condition to be donated are simply better made. Also, I'm able to afford better brands at Goodwill. Who on Earth would purchase White Stag or Faded Glory at the same price one can purchase GAP or Banana Republic?

Anyway, the inspiration of this post was an experience I had today "paying for what I got." Darling purchased a sweet little violin online. I'm fairly certain it was the cheapest he could find, probably not even a hundred dollars. While I'm incredibly grateful for the gift, it obviously needed some work. A number of musician friends recommended a nearby shop, so I finally took her in today.

The owner, S, looked over my little toy with a furrowed brow. He confirmed my suspicion that it was made in China, and slowly explained everything that needed to be repaired and why. The strings are useless and need to be totally replaced, the bridge isn't shaped to the violin, or at all, for that matter, and the tuning pegs, nut, and sound peg all need to be adjusted. He glanced at my bow and explained that somehow the hair is extremely old, but there would be no point in re-stringing because the stick is absurdly light and poorly designed.

Bringing my instrument up to spec will cost $96, not including the bow. S actually offered to loan me a bow and encouraged me to shop around for something affordable, as he doesn't have anything on hand within my price range. If I'm lucky, I'll be able to find one for about $150.

So all said and done, I'll have paid at least $300 for my violin, much more than I was planning on investing. But on the bright side, I'll know that it will play moderately well and have a potential teacher next fall who will know my instrument like the back of his hand. And after spending $300 on this baby, you know I'd better master it!

Interview Outfit Shopping

When we moved a couple of months ago, Darling and I donated many things that cluttered our 700 sq foot apartment. Among those items were the majority of my dress-up clothes, since neither of my jobs required anything more posh than a clean pair of jeans. So the prospect of an office job has me seeking out at least one new set of threads.

Thursday I trekked to Goodwill for an interview outfit. On the way I popped into two salons to ask about haircut prices, and was astounded by the price. The friend who has been doing my hair (and moved away last month) was giving me way too good a deal.

Dissuaded from my trim, I popped into a third location on my way to the thrift store. South Lamar has the cutest little discount store called Hush Hush. It's mostly brand new clothing, though they do accept used clothing donations now, and their shoes are $10. I found an excellent pair of sensible black pumps. That's a little more than Goodwill, but not bad at all for brand new.

Of course I then had to build my Goodwill outfit around those shoes. Therefore, most of the clothing that appealed to me was brown rather than black...After several hours I found some great black slacks and the perfect black shirt with purple flowers. I also purchased an amazing brown blouse because it fit me so well and the first affordable bikini I have every found in my entire life that fit me - the first suit I've purchased in 8 years - and it also happens to be very cute. I also picked up a $3 umbrella (as I didn't previously own one and it was raining), and a 50 cent notebook. My Goodwill total came to $28. The total cost of my interview outfit, including nice new shoes, was less than $30 and looked amazing.

The Perfect Fit

Yesterday Savers was having a sale for which items with purple tags were only 99 cents. I proceeded to search through shirts, dresses, shoes, and pants in search of the elusive purple tags. Naturally, at 5:30 the pickings were nearly nonexistent. The only 99 cent item available was a small, halter-top style dress that is way too cute to ever fit me.

Except it did. And it's perfect for the party our house is having tonight :)

The only problem is a zipper that doesn't. Tonight I'll be held up with clothespins, soon I'll be taking a little lesson in sewing.

Morality of Frugality

"Not shopping is not a moral act at this time. So many people think that their frugality is somehow a new moral front . . . but when people don't shop, other people lose their jobs. That's a fact.

-Sally Singer, Vogue magazine's fashion news and features director

These words stayed with me throughout the day, taking on an increasingly menacing tone in my head. When people don't shop, other people lose their jobs. She has a good point there. I served my customers with a guilty conscience. If they weren't shopping, I wouldn't have a job. That is indeed a fact.

Geez, that's a weight I need right now. Here I am, working 50+ hours a week at two local businesses, spending about 50% of my money on the most ethical available food products, the rest on the greenest apartment we could find (featuring a solar panel, garden, and hippie landlord), supporting my husband as he pursues a degree in renewable energy and explains to countless potential employers that his dependable transportation is the public metro and a good pair of tennis shoes, and doing my best not to shop - and somehow I've inadvertently helped to bring about the biggest economic crisis the world may have ever faced.

My attitude towards this theory is similar to my attitude towards the overproduced goods that our market is drowning in: I'm Not Buying It. No, not even if you give me credit to do so, not if you give me rewards for doing so, not even if refusing to purchase mercury-containing sodas, slave-labor produced clothing, inefficient cars, pesticide-ridden meat, radioactive electronics, and mutated Chinese vegetables brings about the fall of an economic system that depends on exploitation, manipulation, and ignorance to function.

I enjoy being employed. I regret that there are many people unemployed right now and there will be more tomorrow. I regret that if everyone, at this very moment, decided to say "no" to packaging, meat products, petroleum products, and corporate dictatorship, the result would be far from pretty. Our crumbling infrastructure provides food, clothing, and shelter to the helpless, and the helpless includes everyone who doesn't know how to harvest grain, knit a sweater, or pour a foundation. I don't look forward to dealing with hundreds of thousands of people who will be really pissy until they learn how to grow their own tobacco.

When we don't shop, people lose their jobs. Not only in our communities, but in just about every nation, developing or otherwise. Everyone in the world seems to have been occupying ourselves selling each other overproduced goods for so long we don't know how to stop. We're all wondering what to do with our hands, staring forlornly at the clock and twitching.

Those of us abstaining from this failing economy are neither part of the problem nor the solution. The more fully we refrain from participating in the financial sphere, the less benefit we reap from doing so. If my community stops frequenting Wal-Mart, and the local store fails as a result, we are perhaps to blame. However, as we reaped no benefit from not shopping at Wal-Mart, and even suffered consequences from not shopping at Wal-Mart (paying higher prices somewhere else, or doing without certain goods), we could hardly take responsibility for the resulting job losses. We cannot be expected to subsdidize every corporation on the basis of its hiring pool.

The problem here is not a frugal or apathetic public, but an economy that cannot accommodate frugality. And frugality, in this case, is defined as "not spending all of your money all of the time on whatever happens to be in front of you."

When a ship is sinking and the life rafts have cast off, those remaining might feel obligated to nobly go down with the ship, or at least grab a bucket and futiley bail out water. I find myself seeking boards and nails - I'll rip up the deck if I have to - and build a new life raft from scratch. Perhaps this is messy and undignified; maybe I'd give a better impression grabbing a bucket and holding my breath, but I'll accept the consequences of choosing freedom over appearances.

The important thing is that I'm not alone, that there are enough of us to offend Vogue magazine. While we of The New Moral Front can't be blamed for the failing economy - this economy failed itself - we can expect to be the most prepared for it. Our pantries are stocked with dried beans and we've invested in compost, we've broken our soda addictions and know how to get to the library on foot. Some of us are more advanced than others, some a little more radical, but we're in this together. Even the shoppers, the vogue readers and editors, the Wal-Mart managers and union leaders. If the ship really is sinking, everyone's gonna want a new boat.

Girly Splurge

We've had a bit of a spending splurge mid-strike in The Softly household. We saw The Oscar Nominated Live Action Shorts in Theaters, which was amazing. We had a couple of pints and a cup of soup at a new pub a few blocks away called The Fiddler's Hearth. Darling enjoyed it so much he decided to apply for a job there, which required him to take a TABC certification course ($25). Today I purchased a box of bleach and paid my friend/stylist to do my hair and pluck my eyebrows, so I am feeling particularly girly.

My girly feelings are enhanced by a pile of "new" clothes a work colleague gave me from her Goodwill bin. A few great jackets, an awesome skirt and dress, three pairs of pants, and a couple of shirts.

Regardless of our binge, I deposited another $200 into our savings account this week. Really hoping for a great weekend at Job #1 to make up for our splurge and pay the rest of this month's bills.

The Low Get Lower

Seriously? Clothing Manufacturers are leaving Cambodia to find lower wage workers?!

It's not rocket science, people. If companies refuse to pay fair wages to the producers of their product, the availability, quality, and affordability of that product will decrease substantially over time. Systems must maintain sustainability to remain viable. It is not sustainable to ship panties back and forth across the ocean! It is not reasonable to expect that any country that allows its workers to earn less than $100 a month will remain stable enough to ship our socks on an uninterrupted schedule.

Running from developing country to developing country trying to save a buck while we folks back home are forced to choose between health care, groceries, and back-to-school clothes is the epitome of corporate irresponsibility. We can't afford your product because we don't have jobs!!! You are laying off workers in a country most of us couldn't find on a map!

If Disney, Wal-Mart, and whomever else are worried that Americans can't afford to buy their cheap yet somehow overpriced clothing, why don't they shift operations to the United States, pay Americans well enough that we can continue buying their products, charge a reasonable (if slightly higher price) for the product, and assist the unstable economy their survival depends on?

Otherwise this downward spiral will continue until we Americans realize we don't need the products we can't afford, that like generations before us we can do for ourselves what the corporations won't pay us to do for ourselves. Our necessities - food, clothing, shelter, and energy - can be found at home, as they have been for thousands of years. We will simply remember how to harvest them, build and maintain them. Not because we want too, but because we'll have to if Corporations continue lowering wages faster than they can lower prices, moving the bottom line further from our collective grasp.

Homemade "poo"

Darling bought shampoo in bulk a few weeks ago. I'm not sure what brand he purchased, but it is not our usual and it has been reeking havoc on our heads. Not only does it have my hair drastically fluctuating between greasy and dry, but it's made the skin along my hairline break out like never before. The worse part is Darling purchased a huge bottle of the stuff we now need to use up or repurpose.

It seemed like the perfect excuse for me to experiment with another DIY frugal and green concept: the shampoo-free life. According to my (minimalist as ever) research, hair can be washed with baking soda and apple cider vinegar and end up healthy, clean, and build-up free. For the past two washes (over a four-day period) I dissolved a tablespoon of baking soda in a bear-shaped ex-honey jar filled with warm water, and a tablespoon of vinegar in another. I wet my hair in the shower, then massaged the baking-soda water into my scalp and hair. I rinsed out the baking soda with the vinegar, resulting in a little fizz but of course no lather. I rinsed my long hair very, very well, missing the squeaky clean feeling of traditional cleaners. However, my hair is feeling, smelling, and looking perfectly clean so far. Apparently in a week or two I can expect a period of unbearable stringy locks, as my hair folicles should be used to over-producing oil, but I think I can survive that.

Darling is so far refusing to dabble in this experiment, and also emphatically refusing my next proposed lifestyle change, homemade toothpaste. Never before has he determined my green wanderings out of bounds, distasteful, or otherwise inappropriate. I'm doing my best to accept that this is a perfectly acceptable stance for him to take, but it brings me to wonder just how further we can push our own boundaries, where my own green boundaries lie. Some people choose not to garden, others refuse to live car-free, many people are addicted to petroleum products. My husband apparently distrusts and detests baking soda. I can live with that.

Accidental Shopping

Organic lemons caught my eye during our last grocery shop. When was the last time I've enjoyed fresh squeezed lemonade? I purchased three, then headed out today in search of one of those hand-held juicing tools and a crisp $20.

What did I spend $20 on? Not a juicer (though the neighbor has one I can borrow). At Sally Army I discovered a large boxy portfolio absolutely perfect for our filing needs. It has space to file everything from dental bills to education paperwork. I love it, and it was half the price of those flimsy plastic things available at Walgreens.

I then saw and fell in love with a suit. A beautiful quality jacket and skirt set, soft gray, lightweight and just my size. Unable to find a price tag, I took it to the cashier, prepared to be disappointed. This is the Salvation Army that charged me $11 for a single sweater. I couldn't believe my luck to be told that this perfect outfit was only $10!

So now I own a suit. For, um, interview purposes? Since I intend to be job hunting this time next year, and maybe even working in an office, this purchase can just about be justified. Maybe I'll wear it while drinking lemonade...

I bought shoes today. Goodwill had a pair of dark brown Timberlands that may never have been worn for $10.

I also purchased a 13-pocket portfolio for paperwork, which Darling is organizing now, and a new notebook. We had a a gluttonous lunch at Thundercloud Subs. And that's my spending for March.

I should have been working rather than shopping today, but times are so lean I gave my shift away to someone desperate to make rent. There's a lot of talk about budget these days after work. One coworker despaired that he'll be putting his mortgage payment on his credit card - Again! A couple of people have been job hunting, and discovering that there isn't much available this time of year. One or two of us offered advice and condolences: come Summer, we'll all be filthy rich! I remember last July when everyone seemed to be buying cars, and two coworkers bought houses (well, bought mortgages). We miss those $400 weekends!


If Darling and I can get through these last few weeks of Spring on a single income, perfecting our bare-bones budget and putting away money for college, April will come and our net worth will sky rocket! And we will be too busy to take long walks, study little seedlings, and sleep past noon. I need to remember to treasure the now, as well as plan for the future.

Shop Therapy

"The sooner we get this relief in the hands of the American people, the sooner they can begin to do their job of being good consumers," Boehner said in this article.

I was a good consumer today, because I woke up feeling those way down hormonal woes that the average male can only imagine (and most of the month I can't imagine myself). After driving poor Darling mad for awhile I left the house and wandered up to Goodwill. Has anyone noticed that Goodwill is way more expensive than the salvation Army? A nice outfit costs me about $5 at the Sally on average, I paid nearly $20 for the same at Goodwill.

When I was in the dressing room, I hear an older lady (maybe in her 50's?) puttering from door to door. She complained loudly to her friend that the rooms were "FULL of CLOTHING."

As I stepped out of my own dressing room and went towards the rack to hang up my rejects, she turned to me, mistook my direction, and snapped "I was just about to go in there. Are YOU aware how MESSY these BOOTHS are??!!"

I turned and looked at her. She looked at me, hands on hips, lips pursed. I shrugged and hung up my clothes, which seemed to outrage her, "Don't you WORK here?!"

"No," I said, not turning.

"Oh." She wandered off.

I bought an expensive but nice gray shirt and pair of jeans and made my way to Half Price Books, where I made two purchases.

Shop therapy is very, very rare for me, but today was a willful representation of how loose I've been getting with our wallet. According to our bank statement, we spent $300 last month at restaurants, corner stores, and Walgreens. That's probably about how much my Summer classes will cost!

Nice Shop and Facing My Dental Fears

Yesterday management forgot to schedule my day shift. I managed to pick up some evening work, but had two hours to kill. Luckily, the Salvation was next door and I had five dollars in my pocket. I purchased Talbots khakis similar to these and a green Gap shirt for a total of $4.38. A nice little outfit, if I say so myself. I earned enough money last night to pay for my splurge as well as priority #2: The Phone Bill.

I had $5 in my pocket due to a visit to Walgreens for Peroxyl. This is a Hydrogen Peroxide mouthwash that cleans and numbs the area of my mouth which, probably due to wisdom teeth, is giving me a lot of pain right now. The time has come to see the dentist, and I'm scheduling appointments for Darling and myself first thing in the morning. This is scary and a little sad. Having a bad dental situation feels different from having debt, but it isn't. Having my teeth looked at isn't going to cost us any more than ignoring the problem will in the long run. That Net Worth on my sidebar is going to plummet when the doctor bills come rolling in, but at least then it will reflect the whole story. All our cards will be on the table. And maybe my anxiety will be reduced when I have an idea of how much my clean bill of health will total. Currently, I have no idea. $5,000? $10,000? $20,0000? Having a reality to face will ease my anxiety at least a little.

Guilty Confessions

I had a hard day at work and indulged in some pleasure shopping today. I've had my eye on this tank top for some time now, so at least it wasn't necessarily an impulse buy.
Tomorrow I have off work and my mom is in town. I think we'll be taking her to see Harry Potter (for free, of course, I have a connection...), but may spend some cash on food. We may also go to the Farmer's Market. So while we're still on budget (despite the shirt), just barely.

So About That Spending Spree...

My older brother's birthday is on Tuesday, and he has invited Darling and me to go tubing down the Guadalupe to celebrate. My current bathing suit is a little over...let's see...eight years old, I think. A simple purple one-piece that's been with me through thick and thin, except for when my mom was borrowing it. Actually, it might have been hers to begin with.
So you can guess why I forced myself to check out what was available at Goodwill.
Aren't second-hand bathing suits gross? Who would want to wear something that touched someone else's bottom???
Many Goodwills and Salvation Army outlets receive donations from retailers such as Target. The Goodwill I shop at often has such items with the tags attached. You can tell they're straight from retail because there will be seven or eight of the same item. Today I found several sets of brand-new bathing suit bottoms. Unfortunately, they were fresh out of matching tops.
I ended up purchasing a used top and a pair of shorts for $11 total. Would the experience have been easier if I'd bussed to the mall? After all, I would have had far more selection. Would that have been worth the higher price (and the guilt of supporting sweat shops?).
I haven't been to a mall in years. What I remember is feeling fat, poor, and increasingly frustrated that I could never find my dream suit in the endless selection of over-priced crap. Malls remind me of my horribly awkward youth and the agony of not fitting in, of the feeling that if only I could buy more or eat less people would like me. I get the same feelings of anxiety on the rare occasions I see commercials on television.
Thrift stores, on the other hand, make me feel the exact opposite. No glaring manikins, blinding lights, unexpected mirrors, pop music, or teeny boppers. I'm not drawn to sexy displays only to find that everything larger than size five has been taken. Thrift stores tend to be arranged by article and color. I don't have to hope that forest green or chocolate brown is "in" again, and I don't have to hope that I enjoy whatever styles happen to be in season. I can still find camouflage, and neither black nor white disappear for months at a time.
Want to feel better about yourself? Give up media for a while and stay out of retail centers. Instead of being constantly reminded of what you're not, maybe you'll be able to focus on who you are. It's much easier to remember one's true favorite colors and styles without the pressure of culture beating against ones psyche like waves on a beach.